Where does the time goes? It seems that time flees so very quickly these days. Perhaps it is because I am getting older? Or perhaps because life is so fast paced and there is so much to do.
John was off work all week last week and will be off this week as well, taking his shift at the nursing home watching over his Dad, until he falls into the arms of our Lord and is taken home. It seems as if the wait is taking forever. It is so hard to watch his Dad suffer. His Dad's final request was to have family by his side at all times until his passing.
He stays "out of it" most of the time. He is on a full 10 liters of oxygen with a bagging mask on his face. He is down to less than 130 pounds (normal weight for him was 180-190). He eats very little, maybe a cup of applesauce or oatmeal for breakfast and that is it. Maybe some juice or iced tea. All medicines have been discontinued EXCEPT liquid morphine and ativan. His color is yellow at times and gray sometimes. The doctor released him from his care in ICU at the hospital into the care of Hospice at a local nursing home. Unfortunately his insurance coverage does not pay for a sitter. We were told last Tuesday by the doctor that it could be anytime, that day or a week. Tomorrow will be a week. Only the Lord knows the time and the hour when He calls us home!
With weak speech and deep breathes he ever so often asks, "What are we waiting on?", or says, "I am ready to go." He is 83 years old, if he sees April he will be 84. The congestive heart failure, organ failure, non alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver (late stage 4), pacemaker, COPD and emphysema are just more than his body can take. He has signed a DNR and just wants to go see his wife, Marilyn that waits on him "in the sky".
"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are
a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." - James4:14 NIV
It has been a long few weeks trying to keep things going around, home, take care of others that are sick, keep things as normal as possible for the boys and fight this awful MRSA infection. Staph infection is awful. Now it has moved into my eyes as well and they hurt so badly. I hope to get to see the eye doctor today to get a prescription for Lotemax. It is a steroid type eye drop and helps so much during these flare-ups. In the meantime, Mom has a doctor's appointment this morning and she is not doing well at all.
We are wasting not a moment, time is precious!
We are praying for peace during this time. God is good and He always prevails! Thanking the Lord for our blessings! Hope your day is blessed!